Love you so

Love you so. They were the words my grandmother ended every phone call, letter and conversation with. Love you so. She wouldn't let an opportunity pass to tell you how much she loved you and cared about you. As I put on my makeup this morning and listen to soft Christian songs, I knew that today was going to be hard and emotionally draining. When I walked downstairs in my grandma's house waiting for a ride, I kept expecting to hear her voice in the other room or tell me how beautiful I looked, but her voice never came. 

I lasted about three minutes into mass before the tears started coming. The opening song was Be Not Afraid; when I opened my mouth to sing a sudden rush of memories of my grandma came flooding into my mind. It hit me like a brick wall. Her voice. Her singing, so quite, yet beautiful. She meant every word she said, even the words in a song. I could hear her complimenting my singing voice and a lovely smile upon her face. Yet there I stood. Frozen. I couldn't utter a word. 

My brother was my rock.  He had his arm around my shoulders for practically the entire ceremony. I watched as my older male cousins brought in grandma's casket, my younger cousin read the first reading, my four youngest cousins brought up the gifts, my older cousin sang the responsorial, and my other cousins read the prayers of the faithful. Everyone wanted to celebrate Gram's life. My mother's lifelong friend, Monsignor Dave, gave a meditation at the end of the ceremony that was so beautiful and personal to our family. 

Then it was my turn. I listened and waited while another one of my cousins read his eulogy. I was fine. When I stood up behind the pulpit and looked out at the crowd that had gathered, I was overcome with emotion. The church was packed! Every pew was full. There must have been 200-250 people there to celebrate Gram's life. It wasn't the nerves, but rather the realization that I wished like anything that Gram could have been sitting in the second row (her usual seat) to hear me speak. I wanted her there to not only hear how I viewed her, but to give me confidence and happiness. I knew that she was there looking down on me, but I wanted her physically there. And I'll never have that again. 

Sitting in her house talking with my aunts, uncles, and cousins, I was happy to be with family and build more memories. Yet when I finally had a moment alone, every emotion that I had suppressed to try to be strong for my mother and to get through my eulogy came bubbling to the surface. I had to escape to my room before I lost it. As I sit in one of the smallest bedrooms in the house (think 8x6ft, if that) and hear all of my family laughing over a story and yelling over a lost game of Euchre, I am finally coming to terms with the fact that this might be one of my last, if not my last, time in 67 Cotton St. I'm not ok with that. I'm not ready. I have spent every Christmas here since I was born and the majority of my summers growing up. This is home. This is Grammy's house. I just can't. I'm not ready to say goodbye.

Gram's Favorite

Today was weird. It was hard without Gram. She was right here just four days ago. Gram loved Christmas so, so much! We usually went to mass on Christmas Eve so that the little ones could open gifts first thing in the morning. Well, it was just my family in the house, so we went to mass this morning. Throughout the day, everyone trickled in for Christmas brunch. When I say everyone, it could be anywhere from 25 to 45 people in Gram's house at once. It was crowded and loud, but we didn't mind. We all loved it and so did Gram.

She would sit in her favorite chair in the front room of the house for the entire day. Right when people walked in, they would run over and give her a huge hug. There were so many of us that you almost had to get in line to give her your gift. Even though she opened so many gifts throughout the day, she took her time opening and admiring each gift. She was an amazing receiver of gifts, calling everything a treasure and exactly what she needed. More then anything she just loved having us all there. She loved seeing us play cards, which is a daily activity at Gram's, and talking and exchanging gifts. It was exhausting for here, especially these past few years, but the whole day filled her with so much joy.

I kept expecting her to walk out of her room today and wander over to her chair, but then I'd glance at her darkened room and reality would strike, not in a bad way but more as a reminder that things are changing. She had already wrapped all of our gifts, all 10 children and 24 grandchildren, and they were sitting under the tree. So we did open the gifts from her today and had to imagine her smile as we opened them. The older kids have gotten money for the past few years, which is fine. Her handwriting on the card is worth more to me then the money inside. But before I went to bed, my dad told me that there was another gift under the tree with my name on it. I had already gotten my gift, but I went and got the beautifully wrapped gift (Gram always wrapped each gift with an extra treasure, like a glittery flower or an extra-special bow.) . Inside was a handmade earring holder. Gram knew me so well. I wish she would have been here so I could have hugged her, but I know that she was smiling down from heaven when I opened it. She was here the whole day with us; I know she was. And for now, that feeling of her presence is what it getting me through these next few days. As Gram would always say, "Love you so."

Who is your Mandela?

I was so sad to hear about the passing of Nelson Mandela yesterday, yet, when the headline "Mandela dies at age 95," flashed on the television screen, I couldn't help but feel warmth and awe toward the man who had accomplished so much in his lifetime. I flipped back and forth between a few different news stations, and I was enraptured by emotions conveyed in every story about the man. There were stories of leadership, forgiveness, inspiration, understanding, hope, passion. The list could go on and so it did as the stories unfolded on the news casts.

Time and time again, the reporters said that Mandela was a gift to the world, that he touched millions of lives, and inspired so many. These beautiful stories about the teacher brought me to the realization that, while Mandela was a worldly mentor, I have Mandelas in my own life. I look to my parents for understanding, my brother and sister-in-law for inspiration, my friends for understanding, my mentors for leadership, The Lord for passion and forgiveness. Mandela was a visionary and the lessons that he taught each of us will remain alive through the actions of others.

Mandela was a truly remarkable man. He had the support and recognition from the entire world. If anything, this support aided him when he fought for peace and justice. He was loved by all and was told that he was loved. Why is it then that we are so harsh and critical on our loved ones? The very ones that act as a Mandela in our personal lives. As hard as it might be at times, I think it is just as important to give the Mandelas in our lives the love and support that Nelson Mandela received.

His life was summarized by the love and service he gave to the world. He brought peace, hope and joy to the lives of millions. Life could be so much more joyful and beautiful if we gave our personal Mandelas this love and support. It's why I end every conversation on a high note and never pass up an opportunity to say, "I love you," to the ones that mean the most to me. If we can do this, Mandela's life's works will live on and continue to grow, and perhaps this ability to keep on giving and loving is the greatest gift he gave to the world.

Pay it forward

I'd like to start this post by saying that I'm addicted to caffeine. It's a problem. Usually I get frustrated when I spend money on coffee (which I do at least twice a week), but today, my trip to the coffee shop was the highlight of my day.

I always stop by a coffee shop on campus that is combined with a food court. I was next in line to pay, when the cashier said, "$5.35" to the girl in front of me in line. The girl looked at the $5 bill in her hand, looked back at the cashier, and managed to mumble an "uhhhhh, well my wallet..." Normally I would just switch lines; she clearly was going to take a while to go get her wallet, but I surprised myself by blurting out, "Oh, I have 35¢!" The girl looked at me as I began digging in the change pocket of my wallet. "Thank you so much," is all she said, but the thankful smile on her face made my day. It was so spur the moment; I said it without even thinking about it. 

It was a simple act of kindness that made my smile and, hopefully, it made the girl's day as well. As I walked out of the food court, my heart swelled. It felt so good to help out a random stranger. I couldn't help but hope that she now does a random act of kindness for someone. Pay it forward. It will never hurt; it will only make you better and happier.

Seeing the future

I was talking to my roommate this afternoon about random things. I mentioned that I needed to start thinking about who I wanted to take on my sorority's next date night. I grumbled about how I wished I had a go-to guy to ask and how I always seem to wait until the last minute to ask someone on my date nights. My roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Megan, I see your future life and I am jealous of it." It was a quick statement as we seamlessly moved onto another topic, but it really stood out to me.

So often we spend time obsessing over other people. We stalk them on Facebook (whether we admit it or not), talk to our friends about how wonderful their life is, and so on. We put all of this energy, whether we realize it or not, into that person's life. It might seem inconsequential to you, but you give that person power over your life that they don't need nor deserve.

I'm guilty of it. I constantly comparing myself to others; we all do it. While my roommates comment made me feel really good about myself, it also made me realize that I shouldn't allow other people to influence my life in such monumental ways. I should get to choose who my mentors, life coaches and friends are and I will give them the ability to influence my life. I'm freeing these random people that I constantly compare myself to, they no longer have a hold over me (even though I gave them that power in the first place). I'm choosing to be happy with myself and my life and, for now, that is enough for me.

The Power of the Written Word

We write things every day. A post on a friend's Facebook wall. A tweet sharing exciting news. A caption on an Instagram photo. Words, written words are everywhere. Yet the written word that we partake in every day seems to fall short of feeling. We all receive text messages from friends and we don't know how to interpret them. Are they mad? Is it just a statement? What is the underlying meaning? It's part of the world we now live in, this uncertainty when it comes to the written word, yet it holds power over us in ways that we don't realize.

I received a hand-written letter from my grandmother today. I'd like to say that again... a hand-written letter. I know what you're thinking, of course it's hand-written, it's your grandmother. This is true, but Patricia has a Facebook and is quick to pick up the phone. The power that her handwriting held was astounding. There is no "undo" or "delete" when it comes to a hand-written letter. You write in the moment and I think there is something to say about feeling and meaning the words that you write.

I'm a total hypocrite as I sit here writing this blog post on my computer. I constantly change the wording in my sentences and delete words, but I also believe what I am writing. There is something so wonderful about the simplicity of a hand-written note and I love it. Don't be shocked if you get a letter in the mail from me sometime soon. I kind of love the idea of bringing hand-written letters back. I'd like to apologize in advance for my handwriting, though.

Actions speak louder then words

Faith is personal. It is something all your own and no one can take it from you. But, God calls us to share our faith and His name. While many people rely on reciting scripture, I have always had the intention, or simply hope, that my faith and God's word would shine through my actions and my words. It's a difficult task. We all fall--me, both figuratively and literally--but Christ's love is worth getting back up for.

A friend confirmed my hopes tonight when she shared her own revelations about faith and God with me. I apologized that I never said anything about my faith to her, that I had never helped her along in her faith. With complete serenity, she told me that I did. Looking back, she can see God's hand through our friendship and encouraging words. It is so simple and, yet so powerful to know that my day-to-day actions are seen as more then movements. It's a great reminder that, while we are constantly being judged and scrutinized by others, we also have the power to show compassion toward them. Actions are a dynamic thing that so often get over looked.

I've always had this notion that blog posts are supposed to be at least two or three solid paragraphs. Yet, this is all I have. I am still wrapping my head around the idea; I had so many thoughts running through my head that I needed to at least get one written down. So, here it is: God loves us and He calls on us to do different things, lead different lives, and share His good news in different ways. Lead a life that God would be proud of and let your actions be your words.

Life is sweet

So many times I see posts or Buzzfeed links to articles on how to live a healthier, happier, more fulfilling life. I click on the links and read the articles and, many times, repost them. It's a never ending cycle. However, what I have failed to realize until now is that every time I clicked on those articles I was saying, consciously or not, that I believe my own life isn't healthy enough, that I'm not happy, and that there are simple steps I can follow to make my life more meaningful. These articles are asking me to "buy in" to the idea that even when I'm at my best, I can be better. Constantly. Better. It makes me tired just thinking about it.

What I've come to realize is that it's a never ending cycle of disappointment. I read an article that told me I didn't know ABC about being in my 20s and I could be happier if I did XYZ. These social pressures make me look at my parents, who grew up before this huge social media presence, and ask if they were happy in their 20s. How could they be? They didn't have these articles and social media posts helping them be happier and healthier. Yet, I reflect on this past weekend when my brother and his fiancé (now wife) said their vows surrounded by family and friends. I could feel the love and friendship radiating from each and every person in the room. That is a life worth living for and a life to strive for, but I can guarantee that you won't find that in a Buzzfeed article.

Just a few days away from the clutter of social media made me realize that I'm tired of trying to perfect my life. When I block out social media, I can see that my life is pretty great. Sure, I fall and go through tough times, but who doesn't. Those tough times don't mean that I'm any less happy than my neighbor. Those harder life moments are where I lean on my faith, family and friends. I want to turn my focus to the here and now. I'm choosing to be happy with the life that Christ has given to me. It is enough. So to all those articles that tell me I'm missing something in my life... Thank you, but I'm content with my life. I want to be proof that life is just as sweet as I choose to make it. So, I'm making it a double fudge, ice cream sundae with M&M's, whipped cream and a cherry on top!

Realizations

I never imagined that it would be this difficult and take this long to transition back into the college lifestyle from my internship. I've realized two major things since ending my internship:

1) It is so much easier to be yourself with strangers. 

When I met my team back in May, we were all starting from scratch. None of us were Facebook friends, a few of us had met during the interview process, but we were all starting with a fresh slate. We introduced ourselves and were allowed to get to know each other over time. We set the pace for our bonding, but we were together everyday so we learned quickly. There were no preconceived notions and, for me, I was able to be myself without fear of judgement. These people didn't have a choice; they were stuck with me, just as I was stuck with them. We accepted each other's faults and strengths and learned to pick up where someone was not as strong. We became a team, a family on our own terms. 

2) There is more to life than Athens. 

I was fortunate enough to work on some amazing golf courses and to see some spectacular cities this summer! Every town had its own flavor and beat that we got to be a part of for a week. It opened my eyes to the beauty and diversity around the country (or at least the central south) and that Athens is just another city on the map. I will say that it has a very cool, urban, hipster beat with dedicated fans that I love, but it is just a city on the map. My fellow dawgs are cringing right now; I just committed the ultimate crime by saying that Athens is just another city. Don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed my past three years here and I will be yelling at the top of my lungs when the dawgs tee it up between the hedges in Sanford Stadium next month. My summer experience taught me to see Athens as a stop on my own life map. I'm here for a bit longer then our tournaments this summer (4.4 years longer), but I have bigger and better things on my horizon. It's a chance to learn and grow and I'll seize the opportunities that come my way, but moving on when graduation rolls around will be a welcomed change in my life. 

There is so much that the world has to offer and I'm ready to break the ties that a college town wraps around you. I'm excited for my senior year, but I'm excited for life after UGA as well where the slate is clean and there's more to do!

Day 75: Final goodbyes

I can't believe that I said goodbye to the rest of my team this morning. Brett and Tori were so sweet and drove me to the airport at 4:15 a.m. for my 6 a.m. flight. That is the sign of a true friend. None of us were ready to say goodbye. It was so hard to say goodbye to those two especially. They were two of my closest friends this summer. I leaned on them a lot during the stressful times and celebrated with them during our triumphs. 

I honestly can't believe that it's over. I felt like I was going through the application process forever and the. The anticipation for the internship to start seemed to last for an eternity. Now, as I look back on this amazing summer, I refuse to believe that I'm done traveling from city to city and hanging out with my team 24/7. The weirdest part right now is not preping my book bag for a day on the course tomorrow. When my parents and I got home, I immediately asked my dad if we could go to the driving range. Not only did I miss the smack of the ball as the club hit it, but I never actually got to hit a golf ball this summer. It was fun to go out and attempt to hit a golf ball. I was horrible at it (as in only touched the golf ball 10 of the 50 times I swung the club), but I really do love the sport and want to pick it up!

I learned so much this summer. For starters, I learned about golf. Seventy-five days ago I didn't know that the holes on the greens could move, I didn't know how to write about golf (who carded what?) and I wasn't even comfortable in a golf cart. Now, I can write a golf story in 15-20 minutes flat and I can talk to juniors about their round and actually know what they're talking about. I also learned so much about myself and working in a team. My team is absolutely amazing, but we had a LOT of different personalities. It was hectic and clashed at times, yet we always figured out how to power through an assignment and resolve an issue. I learned when to ask for help and when to work harder to figure things out on my own. I learned to keep and open mind and be a sponge, soaking up as much information as I possibly could every day. 

From my host families to golf course staff to the players and their parents, I have met so many amazing people. Since our team was in Louisiana and Texas for most of the summer, we got to see and get to know a lot of the same kids. They're really great kids and are so talented! We were able to see them improve their game and grow as individuals throughout the summer which was rewarding in itself. It sounds crazy, but I'm really going to miss the juniors that I met and got to know, especially the ones that actually laughed at my corny jokes in the starting tent!

My entire team was taking bets on when, not if, I would cry yesterday. I held it together until I got home. I took a nap after my dad and I got back from the driving range. I woke up, sat straight up and couldn't figure out why I wasn't in the backseat of a truck (Friday's were travel and nap days). When I realized that my travel days and the internship were over, I lost it. I couldn't help it. My heart still aches at the thought of leaving my team. We're from all over the country and, while I really want to stay in touch with them as will make an effort to, there's a strong possibility that I will never see them again. It's a weird feeling and a hard thing to come to terms with. 

As I look around my room and mentally prepare myself to move back to school tomorrow, I feel so, so blessed. This summer was life-changing. I couldn't have asked for a better experience. I had no clue that I could accomplish so much between 5-11 a.m. I didn't know that I could rock a polo every day and that I could become obsessed with golf. This summer was one of the best experiences of my life and although I am exhausted both mentally and physically, I wish that I could start it all over again tomorrow. It was by far the best summer of my life!

Day 74: Last day

My last Twitter photo for @AJGAGolf.

I can't believe that today was my last day of work. It seems like I just started a week ago and I just started to get the hang of all of the assignments yesterday. I was on tent tops, table skirts and side panels this morning with Tyler, the tournament assistant. He completed the internship last summer so we spoke about his experience and mine and how to stay in touch with teammates. It was a good way and a good conversation to start the day with. I actually stayed in the starting tent and started the groups off of No. 10. It was fun to get my last bit of announcing in since I didn't get to start yesterday. I actually started one of the girls that I started at the Chateau Elan tournament during training. It was cool, but a weird realization that that occurred two and a half months ago.

After all of the groups were started and my teammates continually called on the radio to say "this is your last ____," I went out on the course and took final round action photography. I have surprised myself with my photography this week. It was a special tournament with so many sponsors so there was a lot of pressure to capture everything and highlight the sponsors' involvement. I had uploaded 30 photos before the first round even started... Normally I have about 30 photos total at the end of a tournament, so I was really proud of the 67 photo Facebook album for this tournament. When I was
ready to upload the final round photos this afternoon, I wrote the captions, Michael checked them for grammar and spelling and then hit upload. When I checked them, all of the captions had erased, so I had to go back through and re-write all of the captions. It was so frustrating, but I was able to rewrite them in just 30 minutes.

Best part of the bag was that most of the
memories were written on the back of
timing sheets and Pace of Play forms.

Since we were short staffed, we took on a lot more tasks than we normally would. It was an exhausting week; I'm not sure I've ever worked so hard for so long as I did this week. Our whole team really stepped it up and I was so proud of everyone's attitude and willingness to take on more then what was required of them.

To end the night, we went over to the Tournament Director's home for dinner. She made a delicious meal and we all ate together, but after dinner she insisted that just the six of us (our "family") go up to the rec room and hang out. I had been keeping a "Team 3 Shits and Gigs" bag all summer, which was just a zip-lock bag that I filled with quotes and funny memories from throughout the summer. We sat in the rec room and passed the bag, each picking one slip of paper with a memory out and reading it to the group. It sounds so cheesy, but it was a highlight of the week. One person would grab a slip and start laughing making it impossible to even read the memory or quote. When it was finally read aloud, someone would launch into another memory that the quote reminded them of. It was a full hour of just reminiscing about the summer and enjoying one last night together. It was perfect.

Last team photo. Love these guys!

Day 73: Multitasking

Today definitely sets a record for the number of different tasks that I completed. I started the day by putting up tent tops and table skirts. While I was out we realized that there was an error on the live scoring sheets, so I reprinted those when I came back in. From there, I headed over to the starting tent to take equipment surveys as well as start the groups. The first group got off on time, but we had to delay the round due to severe weather before the second group went off. When I got into HQ, Casey, our TD this week, had me make some signs and post them around the clubhouse. I was going to stay awake throughout the delay in case we needed anymore signs or website updates made, but after the second 30 minute delay it was nap time. Tori had claimed a club with a soft head cover on it, so I took the little nook that Megatron (our paper carrier) and the starting boxes made. I didn't want to be seen by people walking in the door and I think I accomplished that!

When the weather finally cleared and we headed back out on the course, Brett took my spot in the starting tent so that I could help Casey in HQ with other tasks. I ran out and took some photos of the leaders. While I was out on the course I gave a ruling, which is bound to happen. I was also sitting on No. 17 green when the current leader boy slammed his club down after a bad shot. I was sitting right next to our Senior Rules Official and we went to check out the spot once they holed out. He had taken a divot when he hit, but the club slam caused a three inch impression just off the green. It was a penalty that kept the player from leading the round.

When I got off the course from taking photography, there was a huge ice cream truck sitting next to the putting green. I walk over and it's complimentary snow cones for players and officials. It was the best surprise of the day! I got all of the photos uploaded on Facebook and we got out of the office just 20 minutes after the ops. We went to Mellow Mushroom for dinner, which is the first restaurant that we ate at for our first tournament. Tonight's dinner was my last restaurant meal so it was cool to start and end with the same place.

Day 72: Getting to play some golf

Coffee and photos... I love my job.

Today was my last day of first round action photography. We only have 78 players in the field this week so thankfully I didn't have to sit on No. 3 all day. I was done by 1:30 p.m. and I was able to head in and get all of the photos renamed before Michael even came in to do scorecard entry. Our headquarters is in the FedEx St. Jude Classic, the PGA TOUR, conference room. It's a really nice set-up... and by really nice I mean a 72" flatscreen television hanging from the ceiling, wheelie chairs, a great wifi system, a copier in the next room, and a coffee pot (with coffee) in the kitchen. Long story short, this week's HQ is a comms dream come true.

Today was the first day this week that we got off before the sun went down. We got off around 3 p.m. and Michael, Brett and I went down to the driving range and then actually got the okay to play a round of golf. The guys were all about it, but considering I've only hit probably 20 golf balls in my life, I didn't want to put anyone in danger and tee it up. So, I drove one of the carts, kept score and looked for lost balls. Seventy-two days ago, I never thought that I would have wanted to stay on the course after working so many hours. However, 80% of the memories I have from the summer have occurred on the golf course and I am not ready to give those up yet.

Teeing off on No. 1

We went to the famous barbecue restaurant, Rendezvous, in downtown Memphis for dinner. I didn't realize until we parked and starting walking to the restaurant that I had been there before. It was just as good the second time! We all walked around Beale Street after dinner and then Brett and I went on a walk when we got back to our host homes. The weather has been so mild (with a little rain and a few clouds) that I've been bugging people to go on a night walk. Between the nice weather and a stomach full of barbecue, the walk was a great and relaxing way to end a wonderful day!

Rendezvous is in a small alleyway in Memphis.

Day 71: Under Armour swag & Scott Stallings

Scott Stallings (fifth from right) and the gang.

We had a visitor today. PGA TOUR Professional Scott Stallings was on-site to welcome players and hang out the tournament that he is helping to sponsor. He was a really down-to-earth and nice guy. We got to just hang out in HQ as a group for awhile and talk, which was really neat! He asked us as many questions as we were asking him and he seemed genuinely interested in what we had to say.

There was a lot going on today and I was on a mission to capature each individual thing to highlight my inalienable tournament. I think I did just that! I uploaded 29 photos to the tournament Facebook album today. Normally, I have 30-40 photos/album total, so the fact that I have 29 photos before the first round of the tournament is a little crazy. I'm really happy with my work today!

This tournament is unique for a number of reasons, one of them being that the tournament pairings are unveiled at a party the night before the first round. So, we had the True Temper Pairings party complete with barbecue and two live bands tonight. It was another 16 hour day, but our team has really come together after our two boys left. They were the heart and soul of the team, so we've had to work to keep our spirits high and put in more hours, but we've really stepped it up. I'm so proud of everyone and I'm glad that we can go out on a high note! It also doesn't hurt that we got a bunch of free Under Armour swag today. We had gotten four shirts to wear as our uniforms this week since Under Armour is sponsoring the tournament, but one of their representatives was there today and had a ton of extra stuff so we got to grab a few things. Scott Stallings even autographed hats for the team!

Day 70: Starbucks

Today I worked my last qualifier! My alarm went off at 4:35 a.m. and I thought I was dreaming. It was just way too early. I was flying out the door at 5 a.m. to be to the qualifier course by 5:30. This qualifier was a little different not only because it was off-site, but also because it was in Mississippi, while our tournament course is in Tennessee. It was cool to cross over the state line, but not cool that I had to get up so early. Tori, Brett and I worked the reg tables and got all of the players signed in and ready to go.

I ran to pick up the Regional Director from the airport around 8:45 a.m. What I didn’t tell him was that I had Starbucks orders from the entire team (including the TD), so we were going to stop. I plugged Starbucks into the navigation system in the comp car and it ended up taking us to the Starbucks that was inside of Target. Nine drinks and two cup carriers later, we were on our way back to the course with energy in hand.

I got to be gatekeeper for scoring, which I had never done before. I pretty much just made sure that each person returned their sand bottle and that each member of the group was present before sending them to a scoring table. It was fun to experiment with a new position!

We headed back to TPC Southwind while the ops broke down the qualifier course and were able to finish up the qualifier and prep for the Junior-Am tomorrow morning. We got out of the office around 7 p.m., went straight to dinner and I didn’t pull back into my driveway until 9 p.m. Driveway to driveway time was 16 hours, which officially makes today my longest working day of the summer! Just wow! 

Day 69: Numb

This internship is an emotional roller coaster. One moment you're laughing uncontrollably, the next you're annoyed or insanely tired and the next you're crying. Yet through everything, the difficult situations and the ones I will never forget, are my teammates. We're in this crazy journey together. Although most of the full time staff at the AJGA have completed the internship and there are other intern teams, no one can understand what we're going through except our teammates. We lean on each other for support and rely on each other to complete a task or just talk.

Today, we said goodbye to two of our guys. It was one of the most, if not the most, difficult thing I've had to do this summer. The emotions were just so strong. No one was ready to say goodbye or see the team slowly start to go back to our respective states. I'm not sure if shock or sadness describes it better, but my heart simply aches to have my team broken up. Through everything this summer, I've relied on Bridget, Landon, Tori, Brett, Tschida, Michael, and Moe to help me. I don't know what I am going to do without them by my side. My final goodbyes on Friday are going to be so hard!

Although it was a somber afternoon, we still had tasks to complete. I went with Tori and Brett on the product run, which was the first time I got to pick up the water this summer. We headed to dinner at a host home and they had GiGi's cupcakes! Goodness, I love those! 

Day 68: Walkin' in Memphis

We said goodbye to Louisiana today. I took my last car ride with the group and we headed to Memphis, Tennessee. We rolled into town around 2:30 p.m. and unloaded the comms equipment from the trailer. We're at the TPC Southwind course and, although I haven't ridden the course yet, I can tell it's amazing!

We went to dinner at a local burger place that has some of the best sweet potato fries I've ever had! I checked in with my host mom, Terry, afterwards. I found out that her daughter and son-in-law are the tournament sponsors and her daughter was a Gamma Phi! I saw a photo on the refrigerator and had to ask. Such a small world!

Day 67: Best comp meal of the summer

After the headache that was yesterday, I was determined to have a better day today. I loaded up on coffee, chose my cart carefully—I found my lucky numbers—and geared up for a long day. I was supposed to have the first groups off of No. 1, but I ended up starting all of the groups for Bridget since she is just starting to get her voice back. So Bridget followed my groups on the front nine while I started and they were just making the turn when the last group went off, so I just followed them on the back nine. One of the groups got a red card on No. 5, so they were flying though the round because they didn’t want to get a penalty stroke. Since Bridget dealt with that red card, I didn’t have to give out a single red card today! It was like Christmas in July! I only had to give two rulings as well: cart path relief and relief for a drain near the green. Both are just nearest point of relief, one club length and drop, so they were quick and easy rulings.

When I got inside after my groups finished, I got to work imputing the scores that had already come in. We go through each scorecard and enter hole-by-hole scores. It’s one of my favorite tasks because it doesn’t require too much thought and you get into a groove. It was killing me to be inside though because the Girls Division had a playoff. The girls in the sudden death playoff were both in the group that I gave a double red card to yesterday, so it was just crazy to hear the play-by-plays over the radio. One of my favorite players, Kesaree Rojanapeansatith of Nonthaburi, Thailand, ended up holing out for birdie and winning the tournament. She has been at our past three tournaments so I’ve gotten to know her and her family. This was Kesaree’s first win and she was nearly speechless when I interviewed her for the story. It was so cute and I was so happy for her!

After the interviews, Michael and I were able to wrap things up fairly quickly and pack up our equipment. For dinner, we went to Superior Steakhouse, which is owned by one of our player’s fathers. He reserved the wine room for us and we ate in there. It was a fully complimentary meal and he insisted that we order any- and everything that we wanted. Just to give you an idea, the average appetizer was $16 and the average entrée was $30+. We ordered one of their lesser (yet still extremely nice) bottles of wine that was $82 for the table. I had the special of the day, which was crabmeat stuffed flounder. I got chocolate cake for dessert and the waiter suggested a 2004 Far Niente Dolce Napa to compliment it. So he brought out this little glass of wine; there was a little less than a ½ cup of wine in it. Out of curiosity and because our waiter was super chill, I asked how much that glass of wine would cost…. $30! The dinner for 10 of us cost over $1200. Just crazy stuff!

Said goodbye to Brian Philips, one of the
TA's today. Such a goofy kid!

Day 66: Double red card

Creeper pic of Brian giving a ruling.
Couldn't resist.

I knew before my first group holed out on their first hole that they were going to have issues. They squeaked by the first three timing stations, but went over on No. 17 (they started on No. 10). They were only one minute over gap time, so it should have been easy to make up. I was taking random times on each player to be sure that one player wasn't taking forever to hit her shots and sticking with their group in case they needed help with a ruling. Even with a red card in their hands, they didn't pick up the pace, which caused them to fall further behind the group ahead of them and go over time par. Since they didn't make up any time and didn't show any sort of urgency, they failed to extend their red card so I had to issue a one stroke penalty for slow play. When I issued the penalty, one of the spectators, who I took for a parent, but was actually a coach, became very upset. He started pointing at me, getting uppity and demanding to speak with the tournament director. I tried to keep my cool and sympathize with him, but he really just gave me a headache and made me want to hide. Did he think I wanted to give them a penalty? I'm there to help the groups, not penalize them. It was tough. And to make things even better (sarcasm), the group behind my double red group also went on red card. What a morning!

Jeremy only had three edits on my story!
Such an improvement from past weeks.

When I got into headquarters, I helped the timing stations get caught back up with live scoring. Just as I got caught up with that we had a huge storm pop up and we had to pull the players and spectators off of the course. When we went out to shuttle the players into the clubhouse to wait out the storm, there was a lighting stick every other minute. It was so cool, but pretty scary at the same time. It ended up being a two hour weather delay, but we were able to get the juniors back onto the course to finish the round. Michael and I used the delay to get ahead on all of our work, so it was nice in a way.

For dinner we went to the restaurant that David Toms co-owns, Bistro Byronz. It was a cute little French place. We were all so tired at dinner that we were just being absurd, saying the most ridiculous things and laughing hysterically. It was so much fun!

Loved the drink pitchers at dinner!

True teammates spoon feed each other ice cream.
Honestly, I don't even know.

Day 65: Red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red card

Mr. Rogers!

Started off the morning following groups; I had the first three groups off of No. 1. Having the first groups off of the tee is a huge responsibility because however fast the first groups of the day go, it how quickly the field will usually go. So, the first rules official really has to be on their A-game to get the kids around the course. I gave all of my groups a little pep talk in the starters tents to get them motivated to walk and play quickly... first group of the day gets a red card on No. 2. Not a good start. To make things worse, my last group (or the third group of the day) also goes on red card on No. 2 just as my first group is going back on green card. It was a serious joggling act between those two groups.

Our host home this week!

When I got back into the clubhouse I started entering scorecards and getting ready to write the story. The last group finished around 2:45 p.m. and I was able to write the story and get everything preped for tomorrow by 5:45 p.m. I was pretty happy with that. Although with the work day ending so early, we had to say goodbye to Rogers for good. He has been at four of the eight tournaments we have run as either the TD, SRO or Regional Manager. He is definitely one of the best TD's we've had this summer and I'm really going to miss him!

Tonight for dinner everyone came over to Tori, Bridget and mine's host families and hung in their pool. Unfortunately, Bridget has strep, so she stayed inside. When the mosquitos got to be to much, we moved inside and played Cards Against Humanity, which is a grown up version of Apples to Apples. It is hilarious! I need to buy it!

Day 64: 16 hours straight

There's nothing like working a 15 hour day. Literally, though. I am exhausted! I was at the course and working from 5:45 a.m. - 8:30 p.m. There is something just so wrong about that, especially when it's already super hot at 5 a.m. Hello, Louisiana! This morning, Michael and I put up tent tops and side banners on the five tents around the course and then I stuffed the Junior-Am carts (meaning that I put player bios, hole location sheets, and Nuun tablets in each cart). When we were about ready to send off the 8 a.m. shotgun, Michael gave me any corrections that needed to be made on the scorecards and then I was able to print those out. I will say that, while Monday is an exhausting day, we eat really well on Mondays. We eat off of the Junior-Am breakfast and lunch buffets--much better then box lunches--and then we eat whatever food is at the Players Meetings, which tonight was pasta.

An unusual part of my Monday was my one-on-one sit down with Lauren, who works in the HR department and is pretty much in charge of the interns. She has gone from team to team, speaking with everyone for a mid-summer evaluation. We talked about the good, the bad and the ugly about the internship and my experiences as well as what I wanted to do in the future. It was a nice break in the middle of a hectic day and I was able to reminisce a little bit about my time this summer.

David Toms is on the left.

Next, I inputted all of the amatur's information that played in the Junior-Am. I then jumped to working on finalizing pairings and making copies of those. I also set up the screens and projectors for the Parents and Players Meetings and helped to set up registration. By the time all of that was done, it was time for registration. Normally I take pictures at reg, but Jeremy had me working one of the table, so Lauren took pictures for me, which is why I actually have a picture of me working reg! There was a Q&A session before the meeting with David Toms, the PGA Tour Professional. He is the main sponsor of the tournament and his son is playing in it, so he spoke to the players and parents about his past experiences and junior golf. I had heard a lot about him, but I had never seen him or met him, so I was happy to finally put a face with the name. Not being a golfer, I felt a little out of the loop since he is kind of a big deal. Now, I know!

Day 63: Stake and rope

Tori and I got to sleep in today; we didn't have to be to the qualifier course until 11:30. It was about a 45 minute drive to the qualifier course, so by the time we got there groups were almost done with the round. Our TD came up to use as soon as we got there and asked for use to stake off the scoring area. Normally the qualifier scoring area doesn't get stake and rope, but it was a wide open area and we didn't want parents coming to the table with their player. Now, stake and rope is a total ops job. I've only helped tighten rope in the morning before the round and that was during training in May. So Tori hammered in the stakes while I looped the rope them. I'm not going to lie, the rope was pretty taunt. I wish I would have gotten a picture, because that it probably the first and last time I will be able to do that job.

When the qualifier was over, Jeremy and I headed back to the tournament course since all of our equipment was still there. I had entered scores into the computer as groups finished, so all of the scores were entered before we even left the course, which was great! We were about to get on the highway when Jeremy saw the Sonic sign and, almost to himself, said "I wonder if there's happy hour on Sunday's." I replied that I thought Sonic happy hour was every day 2-4 p.m. Jeremy kind of glances toward Sonic again and says, "It's a chance I'm willing to take. What do you want?" So, on the 45 minute drive back to the course, I sipped on a cherry limeade while writing the post-round story. I finished the story on the car ride, so all I had to do when we got back was upload it to the website and check scorecards. It was time well spent.

I finished up the Junior-Am work since Michael got off early today and I got everything ready for tomorrow. The last thing I did was make copies of the assignments for tomorrow. I noticed that I was working a full day tomorrow. So I asked Jeremy how hours worked. I thought it was dependent upon how many hours you had worked as well as your role that week, which he confirmed was the case. So I asked him why I was working registration tomorrow night since I have worked registration for the past four weeks. He gave me a funny look and opened his assignments. He looked at a few things and goes, "I guarantee that your TD's have been entering in your name wrong on the spreadsheet so it keeps filtering you in to the wrong slots." Awesome. So I ask if Michael and I could switch tomorrow since I haven't had an afternoon off in weeks. The answer, not surprisingly, was no. It's one of the things that I really dislike about this internship. Things never seem to be fair. It's completely luck of the draw when it comes to time off and even when it was confirmed that the reason I haven't gotten an afternoon off is because of an error on the TD's part, it's not corrected. Needless to say, I wasn't a happy camper tonight and I probably won't be tomorrow.

Something that did lift my spirits, however, was our host mom when we got home. We all just started talking and we somehow got on the topic of New Orleans and the conferences that she has spoken at there. So she started pulling out all of her Mardi Gras memorabilia from when she was the Queen of Mardi Gras. We had a full photo shot. It was hilarious and so much fun!

Day 62: Second guessing ourselves

The girls get the Toyota Equinox comp car this week!
Complete with XM radio, navigation and just eight miles
on it when we picked it up from the dealership.

Comms got to sleep in today, so Michael and I went to the course at 10 a.m. this morning. We got there and went straight to work getting ready for the qualifier tomorrow. I proofed and formatted the pairings for the qualifier. When we make the pairings, we take into account the player's name (we don't want two John's in the same group), hometown, performance level, and siblings (we try to put siblings in back-to-back tee times. So I go through the players and look for discrepancies in the pairings that the computer automatically creates. It can take anywhere from 20-40 minutes depending on how many changes you have to make. Then, one the TD approves the pairings, you export and format them in Word so that they look nice and pretty. I actually love formatting the pairings, it's just fun to finally be at the point where you can print it out on letterhead and start making copies.

When I finally printed the pairings, I showed Jeremy, our TD, and he said that we printed it on the wrong letterhead. Michael and I looked at each other and at the same time said, "wait, what?" We had been printing the pairings on the wrong letterhead. Once Jeremy pointed it out, it made sense, but we had no idea. For the rest of the day, whenever we went to print something, we always double checked that we were printing the right thing on the right paper.

For dinner we went to this yummy Mexican restaurant owned by one of our junior's father. We were looking at the menu and Moe leaned over to me and asked what quail tasted like. I explained to him what it was, but I've never eaten it, so I didn't know what it tasted like. He decided that it sounded interesting so he ordered quail with a side of french fries and rice. It was an interesting combo to say the least.

Just a little side note, our host family has the most precious dogs! They are rescue dogs and they are so fun to come home to at the end of the day!

Quail. Yum?

Day 61: Goodbye Texas, hello Shreveport!

I rode shotgun while Brett drove part
of the trip.

We left bright and early this morning for Shreveport, Louisiana. It was a five and a half hour drive, which took about seven hours with the trailer, so we rolled in around 2 p.m. Brett, Bridget, Landon and I drove together again. Bridget insists that there constantly be music playing in the car. Silence or even a radio commercial is unacceptable, so she started out as DJ. We ended up listening to a bunch of Bill Engvall skits and were dying laughing!

When we finally rolled up to Shreveport, we unloaded a little and set up HQ, which is larger than Horseshoe Bay, but not big enough for the whole team to hang out in. Thankfully there is a large sitting room with three wall-mounted flat screens in it, a popcorn machine and coffee right next door to our HQ. Not to mention that there is a copier five paces from the tables where our computers are (aka a comms dream come true)! Freyman is our TD this week and he has been doing tournaments for years now, so he was fully prepared with yardages, time par and volunteer information for Michael and I. It was so much more efficient that it normally is on our first set-up day.

Our dinner receipt: 9 people for $0.27. 

Around 5:30 p.m. we went to meet our host family for the week. Bridget, Tori and I are all staying together with the Allen's, a really sweet couple who lives on No. 5 green. It's a beautiful house complete with pool and spa! Right now only Mrs. Allen is home and she gave us the grand tour and invited our entire team over for dinner on Tuesday for a relaxing night by the pool. We went to dinner with the team at this yummy Cajun place. Our meal was complimentary, but Freyman wanted to leave a tip, so he asked our waitress to charge something really inexpensive, like a soda, so that he could leave a tip on the credit card. She charged us for a cube of cheese, so it looked like a group of nine ate a cube of cheese for $0.27. High rollers, right?

Day 60: Three rounds in two days

The sunrise was amazing this morning! Photo credit
goes to Landon.

It was another early morning today. We had to finish the first wave of the second round, which the groups took a cart back out to the hole they ended on yesterday at 8:30 a.m. At 8:45 a.m. The second wave of the second round started off of the Nos. 1 and 10 starting tees. Once all the groups made the turn, the ops crew and golf course staff followed behind them to cut new hole locations for the final round. Unlike a normal 1- and 2-tee start where the round can start with holes still being cut, all of the holes have to be cut and tees set for a shotgun since there is a group starting on every hole.  The second wave of round two finished at 2:10 p.m. and Michael, Tim and I had about 30 minutes to make the cut, repair, print and copy pairings, print and check scorecards and get all of the paperwork distributed to the players so that they could drive out to their holes at 2:50 for a final round shotgun at 3 p.m. It was a hectic hour, but we were able to blow the air horns signaling the start of the round at 2:59. I couldn't believe we did it and that it went really smoothly. It was definitely a successful 1.75 rounds. 

We were saying at the beginning of the week that we almost had too much staff for how quick the golf course was--time par was 3:50--but it was such a blessing that we had 12 interns and two full-time staff members because it was all hands on deck the past two days. It was a lt of fun to have Tony, Tim, Paul, and Kathleen with us this week, especially because Tony and Kathleen were two of the order people I met at IRW in Marcj. 

The clubhouse was great! It was close to the cart barn,
had a large room for HQ and could fit all of the players
in the ballroom for the meetings.

Everyone was presently surprised that we were able to get in a full 54-hole tournament in just two days. We were at the golf course and working for 32 of the past 48 hours to make it possible, but we did it! Now, time to catch up on some sleep!

Day 59: Keep the camera dry!

It was an early morning with all hands on deck as we planned on getting one and a half rounds of golf in today. Since the cart staff was stuffing cart signs, I was able to update our new General Information (GI) board. The GI has clear plastic sleeves where we put and can easily change paper with important info on it. The sleeves are attached by Velcro, so I, for some reason or another, tried to take the Velcro off of the sleeves. My method: scissors. I got about half of an inch before the scissors slipped and sliced my left pointer finger. That cut made sense. What doesn't make sense are the two huge chunks that I took out of my right fingers. I'm right handed so I was holding the scissors with my right hand am yet my right hand got the worst of the damage. It's still a mystery to me, but thankfully Tony, one of the guys from Team 5, had a first aid kit and Kathleen bandaged me up. 

While the course was still really wet and there were a few puddles throughout the course, it was playable. The first tee times were delayed an hour so that the golf course staff could pump water out of the bunkers and so that our staff could repaint some hazard lines that were still underwater. I made my way out to No. 12 for action photography. Just like the tournament two weeks ago, this tournament has 136 players, so I was out there for a long time and the weather just couldn't decided what it wanted to do. It would be sunny and hot one moment and there would suddenly be a torrential downpour that lasted four or so minutes. The mission of the day was just to keep the camera dry. I ended up ripping a hole in a plastic bag and sticking the lens through the hole so that the camera body was inside the bag at all times. I'm sure I looked ridiculous taking photos with a camera over my bag, but I wasn't about to take any chances.

Even with rain throughout the day, we were able to complete the first round of golf and send off the first wave of golfers again to start their second round of golf. We did have to call in the groups due to inclement weather and darkness around 7:45 p.m., so the first wave will resume play tomorrow wherever they left off, then second wave of the second round will tee off, we'll make a cut and play a final round shotgun tomorrow afternoon. That is the plan if the weather wants to cooperate with us. We shall see!

Day 58: Rained out

No. 11 got a new lake. If you can see the little patch of
grass in the water to the right, that is where the lake used
to end. Everything on the left of the picture is new.

We were expecting a lot of rain over night. It rained all afternoon yesterday and into the evening and we could see water begin to puddle around the course. However, we weren't expecting the course to be turning into a lake overnight. The fairway of No. 18 was completely underwater when we got there this morning. The lake on No. 11 over flowed and created a waterfall into a new lake to the left of the teeing ground. Our tournament assistants were riding the course at one point to check the damage and as the drive on the cart path past No. 7, a fish flopped under their cart.

No. 18 fairway was ready for a pool party.

We immediately delayed the start time two hours (9:45 a.m.) and the ops staff got to leave. About 45 minutes later, at 6:45 a.m. The other comms got to head back to the hotel. Ben, our TD, had me stay to make updates on the website and make new signs every time we had a new announcement. After the rain didn't let up, we delayed the start time until 11 a.m. When it was 8:45 a.m., we pushed it back seven hours and 15 minutes to a 3:00 p.m. start. At noon, it was eight hours and 45 minutes delayed for a 4:30 p.m. start and finally at 3:00 p.m. they called it a day and announced that tee times had been delayed until tomorrow at 7:45 a.m. When it was made pretty clear that we weren't going to be playing golf today, I went ahead and made signs for every possible situation as well as type out the rest of the updates that we would post throughout the day. Around noon, I asked/begged Ben to let me go back to the hotel and take a nap. I was so tired! I could update the website from the hotel and, since it is just a five minute drive, I could always head back to the course if I needed to. Tschida, Moe and Brett came to pick me up... They're officially the best!

I hung out with the boys and watched Sports Center when I got back to the hotel--nothing will put me to sleep faster--and got in a little cat nap. When we were deciding what to do this afternoon, Tschida mentioned this indoor gaming place; we looked it up and couldn't resist! For just $30, you got unlimited bowling, bumper cars, laser tag and $10 worth of arcade tokens. Tschida, Moe, Brett, Michael and I went and it was so much fun! We were there from about 3:30-8 p.m. and had a blast! It was the perfect break from the chaos at the course.

Laser tag! Reliving our childhoods!