Sometimes I wonder if I've missed out on the "college experience." You know, the one that you see in the movies and hear about (especially at UGA): going downtown and to parties every week, drinking, and having a fake ID. Even just writing it, I know that these things don't represent who I am so it's a little confusing why I'm even writing this.
We can always play the "What if" game. What if I decided to go to Michigan State instead of Georgia? What if I chose another sorority over the one that I am in? What if I kept my major as Nutritional Sciences? What if I said this instead of that? What if? It can be exhausting and I used to live my life playing that game. I decided a few months/years ago (I can't really remember when I decided this, but anyways) that I was going to live life and not second guess things. Without a doubt, this decision has made me a better person and I have enjoyed every experience and opportunity that I have been afforded.
Yet, it's nights like last night and seeing photos of people downtown that make me second guess my decisions. What if I did go downtown and drink all the time? Would I have more friends? More funny stories? More excitement in my life? Don't get me wrong. I LOVE my friends and I do have hilarious stories from the past 2 years of college, but I can't help but think of these "What if's" when my friends all head downtown for the night and I'm stuck at home watching a movie or doing homework (I'm a nerd, I admit it.). Will I get a fake ID? No. I'm a rule follower by nature and breaking a law like that is not even a question. I won't do it. But does that mean that I'm living too safe of a life and not enjoying my 20s?
Today makes the 6 months until I turn 21. I know that those months will fly by and before I know it I'll be dreading my 22 or 23 birthday. But watching a lot of my friends turn 21 and go downtown and those younger than me go out each weekend makes me wonder if I'm missing good times and not fully living. Kind of depressing to think about and I know that God made me the way that I am for a reason, but I still can't help but wonder.
