Monday, July 18, 2011

Following Dreams

I am an advocate for following your dreams. If you can dream it up, you can achieve it. However, I am truly an advocate for others following their dreams; when it comes to my own dreams, I seem to run from them. I am not talking about the little dreams, like interviewing for an organization or being a part of something bigger than myself. I am talking about the big, life long dreams, particularly career aspirations.
Throughout my childhood, I was blessed to have a father that worked from home as an appraiser. When my dad needed to go look at a house, I went along with him. Home after home, I fell more and more in love with interior design. Every color, fabric, and fixture held more meaning as time went on. It got to the point where I made a design board for the redecoration of my room in middle school. I searched for the right colors, rug, and bed spread, and then I presented it to my parents as though they were my clients. Who does that?
It sounds cheesy to be in love with design, but I can't help myself. I wanted to be an interior design from the moment I knew what a job was until the summer before my senior year in high school. That summer I got very into cooking and baking. My love for design seemed to carry over into the kitchen, but for the first time that I can remember, I wanted to be something other than an interior designer. Over the past two years, I have changed from nutritionist to book editor to public relations. With the large amount of options and opportunities that I have been given, my mind continues to go back to interior design. I'm not sure what is holding me back: the instability, the lower income, or the small market of the job. The reasons to not be an interior designer are all there, but the reason to be an interior designer is hidden and it has begun to frustrate me. For the first time I have begun to pray that the Lord bless my future occupation. I know that he will lead me down the right road with the right people, but the "what if" of my job still lingers. So, for now, I will still encourage others to follow their dreams, while I sit and work on mine.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Gaining an Angel

I haven't written for a few weeks, because I hadn't found anything that compelled me to want to write. I've found it though. Today was one of those gorgeous summer days: sunny, a few clouds to give the sky depth, a light breeze. I was driving to a doctor's appointment with the windows rolled down belting out a few country tunes when a song came on that I wasn't familiar with. I regret not paying more attention and catching the name of the song, but I know the line in the song that made me want to write. It was a man singing and said something along the lines of "I cried when mama died, but I have to remember that I gained an angel. She's watching over me." This line struck a cord in my heart.
One of the greatest gifts that the Lord has given me is the time that I was able to spend with Faith Cline. I met Faith through my work in Relay for Life, come to find out that she went to my school. Faith was diagnosed with a brain tumor in her freshman year of high school and was told that she had only months to live. Three years later, after graduating early in a special ceremony from high school, Faith passed away. Faith inspired me. She inspired me to be a better person, to keep an open mind, to have patience, to think before I speak, and to always smile. Besides her wheelchair and occasional medical supplies, you would never know that Faith was sick. She never complained or spoke negatively about her treatment. She is my reminder that when I want to complain, I must remember that I only have blessing in my life. I will never forget her.
You would never guess by the way that I described Faith that I spoke to her only 3 or 4 times. Her actions and beautiful presence have changed my life forever.  My friend, who was much closer to Faith, recently text me about her. She was upset and, although she has faith in God, claimed that God took the wrong person. I responded with "We have an angel watching over us. We are so blessed." We don't know the future and we don't always understand why some things happen, but we must remember that God has a plan. Life is not easy, but we must keep in mind Faith's favorite verse, "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me." ~ Phillipians 4:13&19